02-05-2006, 05:38 PM
Best Canadian Joke EVER!!!!
Finally a joke that explains what it's like to be Canadian...
Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six
days. Eventually, Michael the Archangel found him, resting on the seventh
day. He inquired of God, "Where have you been?" God sighed a deep sigh
of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look
Michael, look what I've made." Archangel Michael looked puzzled
and said, "What is it?" "It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put LIFE on it.
I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a place of great balance."
"Balance?" inquired Michael, still confused. God explained, pointing to
different parts of Earth, "For example, Northern Europe will be a place of
great opportunity and wealth while Southern Europe is going to be poor;
the Middle East over there will be a hot spot. Over there I've placed a
continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people,"
God continued, pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely
hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice." The
Archangel, impressed by Gods work, then pointed to a large landmass in
the top corner and asked, "What's that one?" "Ah," said God. "That's
Canada, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful mountains,
lakes, rivers, streams and an exquisite coastline. The people from Canada
are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be
found travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard working and
high achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats
and carriers of peace. I'm also going to give them super-human,
undefeatable ice hockey players who will be admired and feared by all
who come across them." Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but
then proclaimed; "What about balance, God? You said there will be
BALANCE!" God replied wisely. "Wait until you see the loud-mouth
bastards I'm putting next to them...."
Finally a joke that explains what it's like to be Canadian...
Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six
days. Eventually, Michael the Archangel found him, resting on the seventh
day. He inquired of God, "Where have you been?" God sighed a deep sigh
of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look
Michael, look what I've made." Archangel Michael looked puzzled
and said, "What is it?" "It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put LIFE on it.
I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a place of great balance."
"Balance?" inquired Michael, still confused. God explained, pointing to
different parts of Earth, "For example, Northern Europe will be a place of
great opportunity and wealth while Southern Europe is going to be poor;
the Middle East over there will be a hot spot. Over there I've placed a
continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people,"
God continued, pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely
hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice." The
Archangel, impressed by Gods work, then pointed to a large landmass in
the top corner and asked, "What's that one?" "Ah," said God. "That's
Canada, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful mountains,
lakes, rivers, streams and an exquisite coastline. The people from Canada
are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be
found travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard working and
high achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats
and carriers of peace. I'm also going to give them super-human,
undefeatable ice hockey players who will be admired and feared by all
who come across them." Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but
then proclaimed; "What about balance, God? You said there will be
BALANCE!" God replied wisely. "Wait until you see the loud-mouth
bastards I'm putting next to them...."