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+--- Thread: Believe It Or Not These Questions...... (/showthread.php?tid=11928)
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Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - FastandFocusZTS - 11-18-2005
Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 Winter Olympics, these are some questions people the world over are asking!!!!
Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an
International Tourism Website (frightening, isn't it!)
Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked.
Q:I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow?(UK)
A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch
them die.
Q:Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)
A:Depends on how much you've been drinking.
Q:I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto-can I follow the Railroad tracks?
(Sweden)
A:Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.
Q:Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)
A:So it's true what they say about Swedes.
Q:It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact
for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)
A:Let's not touch this one.
Q:Are there any ATM's(cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of
them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)
A:What did your last slave die of?
Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA )
A:A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is
that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is
every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.
Q:Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
A:Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and
we'll send the rest of the
directions.
Q:Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)
A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A:Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh
forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in
Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come
naked.
Q:Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
A:No, WE don't stink.
Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth.
Can you sell it in Canada? (USA)
A:Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
Q:Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female
population is smaller than the male
population? (Italy)
A:Yes, gay nightclubs.
Q:Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)
A:Only at Thanksgiving.
Q:Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round?
(Germany)
A:No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is
illegal.
Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its name.
It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)
A:It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of
anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself
with human urine before you go out walking.
Q:Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A:Yes, but you will have to learn it first.
Please send this on to any who you think will enjoy it as much as I have
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - mo_focus - 11-18-2005
like the Americans the best :), I guess my wedding is going to be in june and i got lots of family coming from California, i'm going to send them this useful Information :). I'm sure it will help them a lot :) :) :)
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - NOS2Go4Me - 11-18-2005
:rofl: rofl: :rofl:
Brain-eating moose? Wow... must be Republican moose imported from the States or something. :rofl:
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - Oscar The Grouch - 11-18-2005
hahah stuffed beaver... :lol:
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - dBlast - 11-18-2005
I stuff beavers with italian sausage. :lol:
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - ZX3TUNR - 11-18-2005
I told an american one time, on lunch brake I have to go out side and feed my sled dogs. Some are smart but I dont get how some are so stupid?
But then again, I find it funny how ignorant some eastern canadians can be towards western canada. Some times, I think there worst then the americans.
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - SVT ZX3 - 11-19-2005
ZX3TUNR,Nov 17 2005, 07:42 PM Wrote:But then again, I find it funny how ignorant some eastern canadians can be towards western canada. Some times, I think there worst then the americans.:beerchug:
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Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - Kool_ZX3 - 11-19-2005
I could easily say the same about western canadians :rolleyes: But i am not going to get into that.
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - NOS2Go4Me - 11-19-2005
And vice versa. You can't do anything with the resources and goods the West possesses without way to market them. There's a reason the TSX is THE stock market for all of Canada. There's also a reason that all major banks have their headquarters in downtown Toronto. It's called Toronto is the business capital of Canada.
It's funny how the West thinks they know what's best for all of Canada while having a small fraction of the country's population. Just because Alberta can afford to give rebates to its citizens doesn't mean they're best-suited to run the country. It's easy to balance the books when you're doing a great job whoring yourselves out to the Americans and their insatiable lust for resources.
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - Flofocus - 11-19-2005
whats with all the separatist s**t. Grow up guys. :rolleyes:
This is suppose to be a funny thread. :ph34r:
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - NOS2Go4Me - 11-19-2005
^^ You park your Focus. Now THAT's funny! :lol:
*sighs*
Why can't everyone just get up in the morning, do their job, and be a CANADIAN? :rolleyes:
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - ZX3TUNR - 11-19-2005
NOS2Go4Me,Nov 18 2005, 10:51 AM Wrote:^^ You park your Focus. Now THAT's funny! :lol:
*sighs*
Why can't everyone just get up in the morning, do their job, and be a CANADIAN? :rolleyes:
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umm actually I dont? been driving it around in the snow and during the blizzard we just had. Stock 15s in frotn and 18s in the back. Its been into one curb so far.
Any way I only said some eastern candians. There are some Western Canadians to that belong in the US to.
Dealing with Americans is so much fun thow.
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - Flofocus - 11-19-2005
If you had a 4wd hatchback in your driveway, which one would you pick for winter driving?
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - Flofocus - 11-19-2005
ZX3TUNR,Nov 18 2005, 01:01 PM Wrote:umm actually I dont? been driving it around in the snow and durign the blizzard we just had. Stock 15s in frotn and 18s in the back. Its been into one curb so far.
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Jay, he thinks its funny that *I* store my focus. I dont see whats so funny about it though. All the stuff I've done to the car is an investment in improving the 'fun' factor of the car. If I was in Alberta, Id probably drive my car in the winter, but with the salty s**t Ontario drops. damn that, I'll protect my 'investment'. ;)
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - SVT ZX3 - 11-19-2005
Kool_ZX3,Nov 18 2005, 12:33 PM Wrote:I could easily say the same about western canadians :rolleyes: But i am not going to get into that.
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Too bad Nos will..... <_<
No one's saying anything about anyone personally here so stop taking it personally guys. No one is better or worse because of what part of teh country you live in. Obviously Nos have been scared by someone from Alberta, thats too bad. Hopefully Ontairio treats you better.
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - ZX3TUNR - 11-19-2005
Flofocus,Nov 18 2005, 11:06 AM Wrote:ZX3TUNR,Nov 18 2005, 01:01 PM Wrote:umm actually I dont? been driving it around in the snow and durign the blizzard we just had. Stock 15s in frotn and 18s in the back. Its been into one curb so far.
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Jay, he thinks its funny that *I* store my focus. I dont see whats so funny about it though. All the stuff I've done to the car is an investment in improving the 'fun' factor of the car. If I was in Alberta, Id probably drive my car in the winter, but with the salty s**t Ontario drops. damn that, I'll protect my 'investment'. ;)
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You guys see more salt then we do. Our city just dumps sand everywhere. There is some salt mixed in but it just leaves more a mess then anything.
Speaking of witch. Talking to a lady today and she thought it was weird how we dump salt on the roads to melt the ice and she was upset that not all RCMP officers wear the funny pants and ride horses.
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - NOS2Go4Me - 11-19-2005
SVT ZX3,Nov 18 2005, 12:08 PM Wrote:Kool_ZX3,Nov 18 2005, 12:33 PM Wrote:I could easily say the same about western canadians :rolleyes: But i am not going to get into that.
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Too bad Nos will..... <_<
No one's saying anything about anyone personally here so stop taking it personally guys. No one is better or worse because of what part of teh country you live in. Obviously Nos have been scared by someone from Alberta, thats too bad. Hopefully Ontairio treats you better.
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I believe that open discussion on topics that matter to all Canadians is better than sitting there and pretending it will go away as an issue.
I haven't been scared by Albertans or anyone else for that matter, but thanks for coming out and playing. I simply believe that if everyone else in this country who cries wolf and separatism would shut the fack up and work towards keeping Canadians in Canada while resolving provincial issues at the same time, we'd be a lot better off.
Quebec wants to separate. Alberta wants to separate. Nova Scotia and Newfoundland want to separate. I say the provinces get to stay, and the dissenters can get the fack out and move to the States or wherever else they'd rather be.
Canada is a marvel of a country - we accept all, judge few, and punish none (even the criminals :rolleyes: ). It's still miles better than the States, and lightyears ahead of anywhere else in the world in my books. It's also quite fine just the way it is. You can drive where you please, go where you please, and work where you please.
If you don't like it, leave. That's my take on things.
Jay - I wasn't laughing at you. I was kidding with Nate - hence the laughing smiley!
Jeez, and you guys accuse ME of being too sensitive.
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - SVT ZX3 - 11-19-2005
NOS2Go4Me,Nov 18 2005, 02:50 PM Wrote:SVT ZX3,Nov 18 2005, 12:08 PM Wrote:I haven't been scared by Albertans or anyone else for that matter, but thanks for coming out and playing. [right][snapback]156624[/snapback][/right]Kool_ZX3,Nov 18 2005, 12:33 PM Wrote:I could easily say the same about western canadians :rolleyes: But i am not going to get into that.
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Too bad Nos will..... <_<
No one's saying anything about anyone personally here so stop taking it personally guys. No one is better or worse because of what part of teh country you live in. Obviously Nos have been scared by someone from Alberta, thats too bad. Hopefully Ontairio treats you better.
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Your welcome, I'm glad you enjoyed reading and appreciated my comments. B)
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - ZX3TUNR - 11-19-2005
oh canada
Believe It Or Not These Questions...... - Random Hero - 11-20-2005
our home and native land