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+--- Thread: Wanna Cause Trouble At Work? (/showthread.php?tid=14480)
Wanna Cause Trouble At Work? - FociPhil - 06-26-2005
On Mondays...
-slap a post it notes on coworker's computer while they are gone with "Pay bookie,""Buy Crack" or "Crotch Salve"
-Anytime anyone asks where someone is, even if they are in the copy room or using the bathroom, respond, "I don't know. He went to lunch, like, and hour ago."
-Put a bottle of Metamucil in the fridge, with an angry note that says "DONT TOUCH-THIS MEANS YOU" and sign it with a coworkers intials.
-Stay fibe minutes later than a coworker. As he or she prepares to leave on time, look harries and busy, and snap, "Half day, huh?"
-Steal all the staplers and stash them around someone elses desk.
-Steal a coworkers idea. Tell everyone how he stole it from you.
On Tuesdays...
-If a coworker i late, joke that he must have been "drinking till three in the morning."
-Email a member of your team regarding a missed deadline, or some other small error, and CC his manager.
-During a meeting, undermine your peer's ideas by cutting him off with, "Wow, i had that same idea!"
-Blow by a coworkers desk and shout, "Stop sniffing your finger!"
-Send an email from a coworkers computer that says, "Printer down!" when the printer works just fine.
-Start a vicious rumour around the water cooler about a coworker on any of the following topics: "So-and-so is breaking up/divorcing,""So-and-so is in trouble with the IRS," or "So-and-so wears diapers."
On Wednesdays...
-During meetings, laugh extra hard at a coworkers mediocre jokes. When asked later, tell people you felt sorry for him.
-Publicly ask a coworker, over and over throughout the day, if he's "felling OK."
-Over the course of the day, slowly soak the carpet under your coworkers chair with cheap bourbon.
-Replace one of your coworkers family desk photos with nude pics of fat Europeans.
-Mispronounce a coworkers name. When he corrects you, just shrug and wink.
-Dump hundreds of show tune MP3's on a coworkers personal server file. This will slow the network down, and IT will have to go searching for the offender.
On Thursdays...
-Compliment the following useless talents: collating ability, colour copying, numerous smoke breaks, and persistent trips to the rest room.
-Set a coworkers desk clock back five subtle minutes.
-Randomly ask a colleague, "Did you hear what [coworkers name] said to that intern?". When the colleague responds, "No," shake your head in disapproval.
-Tell a coworker, "So-and-so thinks your cute." Tension builds as the coworker can't figure out why the person doesn't flirt back.
-Make GeriatricErotica.com a coworkers Web browser home page.
On Fridays...
Tell a coworker that a certain other coworker was in the rest room snorting either a powdered donut or...
-Anytime a coworker shows a photo of their of their husband/wife or boyfriend/girlfriend, remark on how happy you are they "finally found a way to work it out."
-Secretly replace desk toys with bottle of Aunt Jemima syrup.
Good luck everyone!!
Wanna Cause Trouble At Work? - Raine - 06-26-2005
I wish people wouldn't type when drunk.
Wanna Cause Trouble At Work? - focusonthis88 - 06-27-2005
That was in this months Maxim. Maxim rocks! :banger:
Wanna Cause Trouble At Work? - FociPhil - 06-27-2005
focusonthis_88,Jun 26 2005, 04:44 PM Wrote:That was in this months Maxim. Maxim rocks! :banger:
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yeah i got it in a email, then read about it in Maxim...i laughed so hard at some of them...
i copy and pasted the email, so if there were mistakes from people being "drunk" it wasnt me...
glad some people found the humour in it...
Wanna Cause Trouble At Work? - scoobasteve - 06-28-2005
haha, i'm glad you dont work in my office phil :lol:
Wanna Cause Trouble At Work? - FociPhil - 06-28-2005
ill tell ya this, in my office its only me...but if theyre were other people around, i would 100% be doing some of these things.
Wanna Cause Trouble At Work? - ANTHONYD - 06-28-2005
cheap burbon hahaha
Wanna Cause Trouble At Work? - NOS2Go4Me - 06-28-2005
What has been done previously here:
- "net send" messages from one PC to another via remote console to imitate one co-worker messaging another, or that one person's computer appeared to be messaging its user - "Why don't you clean me up? I need love too!"
- using remote Comp Mgmt consoles to eject CD trays during random points during the day
- Scheduling programs to open and close, run scripts that display funny text messages - ie 9AM, open Notepad with file haha.txt - "I need a hug... don't you?"
- For a buddy of mine, we remoted into his box and took over his desktop, without him knowing... and left it that way all day. Periodically, his mouse would "change its mind" mid-direction, and IE would close without reason. Hilarious.
- "Pinging" my boss's computer via remote console from another box or server knowing it'll set off a preset traffic alarm.
Wanna Cause Trouble At Work? - ZX5focused - 06-28-2005
NOS2Go4Me,Jun 27 2005, 01:28 PM Wrote:What has been done previously here:
- "net send" messages from one PC to another via remote console to imitate one co-worker messaging another, or that one person's computer appeared to be messaging its user - "Why don't you clean me up? I need love too!"
- using remote Comp Mgmt consoles to eject CD trays during random points during the day
- Scheduling programs to open and close, run scripts that display funny text messages - ie 9AM, open Notepad with file haha.txt - "I need a hug... don't you?"
- For a buddy of mine, we remoted into his box and took over his desktop, without him knowing... and left it that way all day. Periodically, his mouse would "change its mind" mid-direction, and IE would close without reason. Hilarious.
- "Pinging" my boss's computer via remote console from another box or server knowing it'll set off a preset traffic alarm.
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"WHEN I.T. ATTACKS!!!!"