Hi, Guest
Okay, blame a stroke of insanity (or just a plain stroke) but without further ado I give you all:
THE TWELVE DAYS AFTER CHRISTMAS - STARRING THE FORD FOCUS
On the first day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, a mysteriously drained battery.
On the second day after Christmas, my Focus gave to me, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (Maybe it's the alternator?)
On the third day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (Is it the radio?)
On the fourth day after Christmas, my Focus gave to me, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (An electrical short?)
On the fifth day after Christmas, my Focus gave to me, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (A gremlin?)
On the sixth day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (Do I have to sacrifice a virgin to fix this?)
On the seventh day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, seven screwed up sensors, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (Kill that Ford mechanic -grr-)
On the eighth day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, eight hoses a'leaking, seven screwed up sensors, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (Shoulda bought a Civic)
On the ninth day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, nine wires burning, eight hoses a-leaking, seven screwed up sensors, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (-sounds of gun being cocked- This'll fix 'er)
On the tenth day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, ten bulbs a'blowing, nine wires burning, eight hoses a'leaking, seven screwed up sensors, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (-gunshot rings out and car alarm goes off- SHADDUP!)
On the eleventh day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, eleven weird noises, ten bulbs a'blowing, nine wires burning, eight hoses a'leaking, seven screwed up sensors, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (So you mean I can't hook up a 1,000W sound system to a stock Focus? I WANT A REFUND!)
On the twelfth day after Christmas my Focus gave to me twelve TSB's, eleven weird noises, ten bulbs a'blowing, nine wires burning, eight hoses a'leaking, seven screwed up sensors, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (That's it, next time I'm buying a horse damnit!)
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night (Hope your Focus starts in the morning :D)
NefCanuck
THE TWELVE DAYS AFTER CHRISTMAS - STARRING THE FORD FOCUS
On the first day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, a mysteriously drained battery.
On the second day after Christmas, my Focus gave to me, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (Maybe it's the alternator?)
On the third day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (Is it the radio?)
On the fourth day after Christmas, my Focus gave to me, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (An electrical short?)
On the fifth day after Christmas, my Focus gave to me, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (A gremlin?)
On the sixth day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (Do I have to sacrifice a virgin to fix this?)
On the seventh day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, seven screwed up sensors, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (Kill that Ford mechanic -grr-)
On the eighth day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, eight hoses a'leaking, seven screwed up sensors, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (Shoulda bought a Civic)
On the ninth day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, nine wires burning, eight hoses a-leaking, seven screwed up sensors, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (-sounds of gun being cocked- This'll fix 'er)
On the tenth day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, ten bulbs a'blowing, nine wires burning, eight hoses a'leaking, seven screwed up sensors, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (-gunshot rings out and car alarm goes off- SHADDUP!)
On the eleventh day after Christmas my Focus gave to me, eleven weird noises, ten bulbs a'blowing, nine wires burning, eight hoses a'leaking, seven screwed up sensors, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (So you mean I can't hook up a 1,000W sound system to a stock Focus? I WANT A REFUND!)
On the twelfth day after Christmas my Focus gave to me twelve TSB's, eleven weird noises, ten bulbs a'blowing, nine wires burning, eight hoses a'leaking, seven screwed up sensors, six annoying rattles, five blown fuses, four flat tires, three oil leaks, two wrecked CV joints and a mysteriously drained battery (That's it, next time I'm buying a horse damnit!)
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night (Hope your Focus starts in the morning :D)
NefCanuck
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