Hi, Guest
10-15-2005, 05:20 AM
Good goal puppet.
I don't often like to talk about my past as it involves a lot of things that happened to me as a child that more or less were beyond my control at the time. I know I'm where I am because I gave up on myself at age 15, under all the stress I was under then.
I used to be a good ( not great ) athlete in high school and I will admit it was great being in shape and being able to go out with girls and not think anything of the future other than the up coming foot ball games. Of course fate or time is a cruel thing, and well I took up too many things at once ( ie. 2 jobs, plus school, and football ) and it really took it out of me, my first relationship came to an end and really after that I stopped caring about myself.
Well I know now that was a mistake, and after 4 years of severe depression, and being hospitalized 4 times during that 4 year time frame. Not to mention all the anti-depressants I was on during that time frame I finally woke up and said to myself I don't want to be 30, living at home, and more or less be living dead.
So Since just before I turned 19 I got a job, and started to work on myself, I'll admit I'm still sheepish around people as I'm still re-learning how to socialize again and I know I'm not going to have that great body I used too, as I abused it.
So, I'm 26 now, and I can say I have some direction in my life again and yeah it's related to that spat I woke up from. I can say I've done 3/4 of my to do list since then, and the last part is getting back into shape, not perfect mind you. But I'm making the effort, I know it's going to take me a while to get to where I want to be but I have a more positive outlook on my life by the time I'm 30. Only a few more months and then I can say I can afford to do the things I wanted to have now, like a gym membership as school will be done completely, and I'll be entering a higher paying job then I'm currently in now.
So hearing / reading what you guys post is a form of that push I need because I find we're all pretty positive when it comes to issues like this, and it makes me feel good because I know I'm getting that support from here, as strange as that sounds.................. :huh:
I don't often like to talk about my past as it involves a lot of things that happened to me as a child that more or less were beyond my control at the time. I know I'm where I am because I gave up on myself at age 15, under all the stress I was under then.
I used to be a good ( not great ) athlete in high school and I will admit it was great being in shape and being able to go out with girls and not think anything of the future other than the up coming foot ball games. Of course fate or time is a cruel thing, and well I took up too many things at once ( ie. 2 jobs, plus school, and football ) and it really took it out of me, my first relationship came to an end and really after that I stopped caring about myself.
Well I know now that was a mistake, and after 4 years of severe depression, and being hospitalized 4 times during that 4 year time frame. Not to mention all the anti-depressants I was on during that time frame I finally woke up and said to myself I don't want to be 30, living at home, and more or less be living dead.
So Since just before I turned 19 I got a job, and started to work on myself, I'll admit I'm still sheepish around people as I'm still re-learning how to socialize again and I know I'm not going to have that great body I used too, as I abused it.
So, I'm 26 now, and I can say I have some direction in my life again and yeah it's related to that spat I woke up from. I can say I've done 3/4 of my to do list since then, and the last part is getting back into shape, not perfect mind you. But I'm making the effort, I know it's going to take me a while to get to where I want to be but I have a more positive outlook on my life by the time I'm 30. Only a few more months and then I can say I can afford to do the things I wanted to have now, like a gym membership as school will be done completely, and I'll be entering a higher paying job then I'm currently in now.
So hearing / reading what you guys post is a form of that push I need because I find we're all pretty positive when it comes to issues like this, and it makes me feel good because I know I'm getting that support from here, as strange as that sounds.................. :huh:
I was the only member on this board with a Yellow Focus Sedan, and a 2002+ Euro Facelift on a sedan.